This article is brought to you as part of the ASCAP Member Wellness Program.

 

As a music creator, you’re probably aware that you’ve got talent. You wouldn’t have otherwise devoted yourself to a career or serious hobby in this field if you didn’t believe that, right?

 

But if you occasionally find yourself struggling with self confidence, you should know that you’re not at all alone.

 

“Many creative individuals struggle with low esteem or low self-concepts and are often dogged with self-doubt, low self-confidence and social anxiety,” says Melissa Hunter, L.P.C., a therapist specializing in the treatment of obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety and anxiety spectrum disorders.

 

“Fortunately, there are effective ways to overcome self-limiting beliefs.”

 

Read on for advice and tips from Hunter and other leading behavioral experts to help you unlock your confidence as a musician and creator.

 

 

Recognize that every performance gets you closer to your best performance

 

According to Tom Grebouski, Ph.D., L.C.M.H.C., a peak performance specialist, cognitive behavior specialist, and CFO at Insights Group Psychological & Coaching Services in Rye, N.H., the first step in unlocking your self-confidence is recognizing that the more time you spend exercising your creative muscle, the closer you are to advancing your craft. As such, you have to just put yourself out there even if you don’t think you’re ready.

 

“Recognize that based on your time in front of audiences or hours expended in practicing your craft, you are already moving up in your skill set,” he says. “If you wait until you think you are perfect, you will never get on stage. Without confidence in your abilities at this point, at this moment, you are stalling yourself.”

 

 

Have patience when removing lifestyle barriers

 

Not only can negative habits like alcohol and drug use increase the apprehension to perform, but they prevent you from engaging your full attention, Grebouski says. As a result, you’ll be likely to underperform in relation to what you are capable of on a given day. 

 

“We often try to quit [vices] suddenly, and although some people can pull that off, very few will, so it’s better to take an honest look at actual use and cut out a specific percentage,” he says. “Making and keeping this commitment to yourself goes a long way in building confidence in dealing with the challenges of our lives.”

 

 

Start your day with gratitude (and end it with props)

 

Adhering to routines alone will help boost confidence in your abilities—and making a routine of practicing gratitude in particular will allow you to reflect on what is going well in your life and start the subconscious brain off on a positive note every day, Grebouski says. 

 

“This in turn shapes what we pay attention to around us and we begin to notice all the wonderful opportunities that are just a decision away.”

 

Similarly, Grebouski says, you can reinforce your self-confidence by ending each day with identifying ways you succeeded in your creative work.

 

“Sometimes grand, other times smaller, [identifying] these successes right before falling asleep builds our confidence and brings our attention to how we are moving ourselves forward.”

 

 

Work backwards and envision that positive end result

 

Grebouski encourages his clients to imagine the end result, whether it’s an important performance or the peak of their career, and see themselves, as vividly as possible, in that position and identity. 

 

“Once that vision is solid, write it down at the top of a whiteboard chart, or even a piece of paper—something to hold on to,” he says. “Then begin to work backwards, outlining the steps of the journey to that peak, all the way back to where you are today and continuing several steps further so you can see that progress has already been made.”

 

This helps build confidence by recognizing you are already on your way, especially since most often the first steps (which you’ve already taken) are the hardest in the journey. 

 

“As you examine the steps, consider those who went before you. They got where you want to go, and so can you,” Grebouski says. “Use their journey as a model to help fill in your path. [It may] not be [your] same exact path, but it will help you learn from their mistakes and successes as you make your moves.”

Let go of the idea that you need to achieve perfection 

According to Matt Glowiak, Ph.D, L.C.P.C., a licensed professional counselor and addiction specialist who works with musicians and creatives, this is one of the biggest challenges for many musicians; when they internalize mistakes and begin entertaining the belief that they are inadequate, it flips self-talk from positive to negative. 

“Though the negative self-talk may lead toward practicing more and ultimately performing at a higher level, it comes at a great cost,” he says. “The only time one feels worthy is when one performs perfectly, which is an unrealistic expectation, [as] everyone makes mistakes.”

 

Rather than beat yourself up for making mistakes, you’ll be better served by holding yourself accountable, he says. 

 

“Consider how to correct the mistake in the future, practice it through, and continue supporting yourself. If the self-talk you engage in is not the type of criticism you would give a close friend, then it is too harsh for yourself—and counterproductive.”

Practice self-affirmations and defuse negative thoughts

According to Hunter, using simple cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques can have powerful, long-lasting effects on boosting low self-esteem.

“For example, if you want to build up the courage to show your music to others, one way to go about this is to practice self-affirming statements such as ‘I like my music' or ‘I’m a great guitar player,’” she says. “Even if you don’t necessarily believe these statements, saying them daily, preferably in front of a mirror, can start to elevate self-esteem.”

Additionally, using a simple CBT defusion technique when a negative thought occurs will help you to avoid internalizing it as a “truth,” Hunter adds. For instance, if a negative thought pops into your head like, “People won’t like my guitar playing,” the next thing to do is respond to that thought with, “I just had a thought that people won’t like my guitar playing, but that’s just a thought,” followed by "I'm letting that thought go."

Of course, when you are trying to make personal changes, it is important to engage in a daily practice of these techniques, “and multiple times a day derives the best results,” Hunter says.

“So each time you catch a negative thought that threatens your self confidence, use the defusion technique; and throughout the day, maybe every time you walk past a mirror, say or think to yourself a positive, affirming statement.”